Early morning all!
Why am I awake at 2am worrying?*
Why am I worrying about handing over my car to his new owner?
Why am I worrying about me not having an income?
Why am I worrying about having our house sitters in?
Is it because we made various promises with the idea that we were leaving last week and now the possibility of staying here for an extra three months is rearing its ugly head?
Our house sitters need a new place to live ASAP - their current landlord is making things very difficult for them. We effectively said they could live here from last weekend. Umm, how? There isn't room for us all! I've effectively sold my car. Soon I will be carless, which will be blasted inconvenient. I'll just have to get used to catching PT and riding my bike to the shops that I can get my GF food at. I have promised various people various items (in particular one person).
I hate breaking promises or assurances. That is probably what is fussing me most.
Other things are fussing me too. If we leave here in September, I will need to earn an income of some sort between now and then. How? Noone wants to employ someone for that little time (temping I hear you say - umm, yeah, I've been doing that and since last September I've had two months of work, and two offers of working in a call centre dealing with insurance agents. I *hate* working on the phones. I'm too introvert to enjoy it. I particularly hate working with agents, who think they know everything cos they have been selling a product they know jack all about). So I'll have to lie about my intention to stay in a job.
If we leave here in September, it means that I will be going from one winter to another, and I hateses winter I does! It is all short days and coldness. I am a long days girl. We will be leaving just as the days are really starting to lengthen out here and spring will be springing. I love spring and the idea of having two winters in a row is very very daunting, especially a winter involving subzero temperatures.
Sigh. So there is my 2am fussing, all laid out.
*(Could it simply be because I ate a yummy soup with lots of chickpeas and kumara/sweet potato and now have the bloats which then induces fussing along with other unpleasantness?)