A bit lost
G'day all!
I'm feeling a bit lost and lonely at the moment. It is weeks since I saw any friends - they were sick, this week I have a low immune system and shouldn't go out much. It's been months since I did much - a couple of weeks ago a lovely Raveller from California took me up to the Dandenongs with her Aussie friend (so nice to get out of the house and me not driving was even better!). The last time I went anywhere before that was in March. I'm not used to having to hang around home so much. Even on my good week(s) I still either don't have an immune system to speak of or I don't have the stamina to drive very far (and DH can't drive the car easily cos it is small and he is large and looks like a grasshopper behind the wheel). Gibbering is taking me out on Wednesday (cross fingers) so that will be good.
Plus today I knocked a glass of water over on my laptop. I am pretty sure it survived the dousing as I frantically wiped water off it and hit the power button to do an emergency shutdown. But it means I don't have my usual files and stuff cos I am using the gateway computer to do stuff and it doesn't have my stuff on it.
Then I logged on to online banking to get our account balance and statements and stuff so we can take them to Centrelink tomorrow to claim the dole, and I nearly had a heart attack. We are pretty much skint. I wish I had rung them a month ago when I knew that no jobs were likely to turn up, no real jobs at least, and before our savings were gone. Doesn't really help that I've had to pay nearly $500 in bills in the last week. Also, I still haven't paid the footy club membership and for some reason that is important to me and I really want to buy in again - I have been a member for all bar one of about the last 20 years. People have offered us loans but how can you take a loan when you don't know that you can pay it back?
All in all, I'm feeling a bit lost and lonely. I thought we'd be ok coming home. Then I was diagnosed with cancer and all the jobs that Nathan was a "shoo-in" for fell through cos he wasn't the shoo-in that Everyone said he was and suddenly I am reduced to whining on my blog.
I think it is time to go eat some So Good and try not to cry in it. I am not sure it is so good but it is certainly hitting the spot as far as I can tell, given I've got little in the way of a sense of taste. It feels nice in my mouth and smells good. Yes folks, I've found an "icecream" that is tolerable - I just had to look in the right supermarket. Thanks for the suggestions, btw, I shall take some of those up! We do have an icecream maker but it is substantial effort to make sorbet even and I'm not always up for effort. (Oh how the mighty have fallen, though I did ride up to the council offices to pay the rates and then picked up books at the library and dawdled home.)
Hopefully tomorrow I can put the laptop back together and it will be fine and I will have my own computer back rather than using DH's account.... Hopefully we will get the dole - I presume it will take a couple of weeks before any moulah comes through and we have enough for that I think. Hopefully something will start going right regarding our cash flow problem. And maybe I'll feel like the Nut looks in the photo tomorrow.
anon!
I'm feeling a bit lost and lonely at the moment. It is weeks since I saw any friends - they were sick, this week I have a low immune system and shouldn't go out much. It's been months since I did much - a couple of weeks ago a lovely Raveller from California took me up to the Dandenongs with her Aussie friend (so nice to get out of the house and me not driving was even better!). The last time I went anywhere before that was in March. I'm not used to having to hang around home so much. Even on my good week(s) I still either don't have an immune system to speak of or I don't have the stamina to drive very far (and DH can't drive the car easily cos it is small and he is large and looks like a grasshopper behind the wheel). Gibbering is taking me out on Wednesday (cross fingers) so that will be good.
Plus today I knocked a glass of water over on my laptop. I am pretty sure it survived the dousing as I frantically wiped water off it and hit the power button to do an emergency shutdown. But it means I don't have my usual files and stuff cos I am using the gateway computer to do stuff and it doesn't have my stuff on it.
Then I logged on to online banking to get our account balance and statements and stuff so we can take them to Centrelink tomorrow to claim the dole, and I nearly had a heart attack. We are pretty much skint. I wish I had rung them a month ago when I knew that no jobs were likely to turn up, no real jobs at least, and before our savings were gone. Doesn't really help that I've had to pay nearly $500 in bills in the last week. Also, I still haven't paid the footy club membership and for some reason that is important to me and I really want to buy in again - I have been a member for all bar one of about the last 20 years. People have offered us loans but how can you take a loan when you don't know that you can pay it back?
All in all, I'm feeling a bit lost and lonely. I thought we'd be ok coming home. Then I was diagnosed with cancer and all the jobs that Nathan was a "shoo-in" for fell through cos he wasn't the shoo-in that Everyone said he was and suddenly I am reduced to whining on my blog.
I think it is time to go eat some So Good and try not to cry in it. I am not sure it is so good but it is certainly hitting the spot as far as I can tell, given I've got little in the way of a sense of taste. It feels nice in my mouth and smells good. Yes folks, I've found an "icecream" that is tolerable - I just had to look in the right supermarket. Thanks for the suggestions, btw, I shall take some of those up! We do have an icecream maker but it is substantial effort to make sorbet even and I'm not always up for effort. (Oh how the mighty have fallen, though I did ride up to the council offices to pay the rates and then picked up books at the library and dawdled home.)
Hopefully tomorrow I can put the laptop back together and it will be fine and I will have my own computer back rather than using DH's account.... Hopefully we will get the dole - I presume it will take a couple of weeks before any moulah comes through and we have enough for that I think. Hopefully something will start going right regarding our cash flow problem. And maybe I'll feel like the Nut looks in the photo tomorrow.
anon!
Hi Lynne,
ReplyDeleteBest wishes with Centrelink, and all that stuff. We miss you! We're thinking of you.
xx Katie
That all sounds pretty horrid so I hope tomorrow is a much better day and the Centrelink people are helpful and co-operative.
ReplyDeleteVery cute cat picture!!
I think you should be able to have a jolly good moan on your blog, sometimes you just need it.
Well, sucky. Good luck with Centrelink tomorrow! Maybe at the end of tomorrow, things will look very different, and better :)
ReplyDeleteLynne, no wonder you're sad and lonely. Tis your blog, if you can't moan here, where can you moan! And I think you're totally entitled to moan. I know I would be. I do hope things look up soon. Good luck and big hugs.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes with everything and don't worry about the whining. The purple shawl from a few posts ago is absolutely stunning! It proves that, just once in awhile, not listening to mom is a good idea.
ReplyDeleteI'm with the others if you want to have a whine and it helps get it off your chest go for it!! "They" always say it's better to let the angst out so it doesn't fester. If I was in your shoes, sick, unemployed, running low on cash I'd be in a much worse state than you appear to be in. So kudos for thinking of ways and means of finding money to support yourself and for keeping up with your knitting to keep your spirits up. The end is in sight for your treatment and it's often right before the end of something that we feel the least able to cope. So from us to you....good luck, we're thinking of you and wishing and hoping that all turns out well with your treatment and recovery and that life will continue on as per usual for you for may years to come. *Hugs*
ReplyDelete